My Wedding

There are days I wake up and cannot for the life of me understand why I am so blessed.  What makes me so special?  Nothing at all.  It's just that I have a heavenly Father who loves and cherishes me and puts the best of everything into my life!  I am broken and flawed and as imperfect as a person can be, but He does not deny me His love.  I am a hot mess five out of seven days a week and still He showers me with blessings.  It is all to His glory what just happened to me, the day I was blessed with, the love I was shown by others.  It was totally and completely God showing up and showing off like He always likes to do.  It was all those times He puts the sky up for me and I let Him know how wonderful and beautiful it is and I thank Him knowing it's there just for me, even though the rest of the world can see it too.
I had no idea what God would do when I decided we should renew our vows.
We'd just come from a lovely wedding our friends had New Year's Eve and now that I think about it, we totally forgot to wish one another a Happy New Year and kiss and I feel sure we were already in the bed asleep when the clock struck midnight.
I made the event a couple of days later and then God began to grow it.
It grew and grew until I thought I would die of happiness before the big day arrived.
Blessing after blessing poured in, in ways I've never experienced before.
I love to give, to do, to be a blessing to other people and I mean it when I say I never expect anything back.
Over the three months it took for the time to pass, God blessed me through his people and taught me to graciously accept those blessings.  I really think He was putting me a place where I wouldn't cry the entire day, although I did cry and cry and cry for nearly a month preceding it.  This totally amused my husband and he began calling me Crybaby.
I have a new found respect for wedding planners, photographers and those who make this sort of thing their living.
My girls threw me the most amazing party, to try on wedding dresses, their wedding dresses and it was so much fun!!  The pictures were amazing and what bride wouldn't love a photo album wearing different wedding dresses?  I had in fact set my heart on a dress, a dress I drove two hundred miles to get, a dress that my friend Robyn wore when she got married.  I didn't know it was the dress until Caryl helped me put it on and it fit like it was made for me.  In that moment a joy welled up in my heart I couldn't explain and I told Robyn I just had to wear her dress.
She and I have been friends since the 8th grade and had not seen each other since 1986 until the summer before last.  I've only seen her twice since then, once for less than half an hour, but I love her and she is my friend and we talk pretty regularly over facebook and have had phone calls over the last year.
I sat in front of the computer too long, on Sunday, listening to music, just goofing off.  My husband left for church and I was left to get ready for our vow renewal.  Then, Emily and Caryl and Melissa showed up and got me ready, hair, temporary tattoos and I'm so thankful Melissa was busy fixing my hair at the time because they ended up on my left arm instead of my right and that made them in the perfect place for the pictures.  Emily helped me get into the dress and Melissa's two little girls, who were standing off to the side said "Wow." at the same time.  I knew I'd made the right choice all along, but that moment sealed the deal.
His family was running late, we were in a crunch for time, we live streamed the service so we would know the exact moment they were finished.
They put me in the truck and wisked me off to the bar.  It was a beautiful day, just another sweet touch God placed on a day so important to us and the restoration of our marriage.
They parked near where my brother was parked, on the side of the building toward the backside of the parking lot and he went in without even saying hi, but that's fine he was here for me.
I sat in the truck waiting for them to come and get me, beginning to worry about sweating, because of my make up.  LOL.  We all have this worry at one time or another.
They came running out to get me and help me around to the door.
Nathan was in the parking lot, my ex daughter in law's fiance and he voiced his appreciation.
Standing at the front door, hearing my friend Donella sing, I just happened to catch a glimpse of Robyn's beautiful daughter, Amara and that moment in time will be forever captured because Caryl took a picture of me as I was exclaiming, "She lied to me!"  So there I am, standing in my girlfriend's dress, waiting to go in and marry my husband again.  I was and still am the happiest woman in the world.
As I walked in to the bar, everyone cheered and whooped me in.  I cannot describe what that felt like.
I don't know if I was shaking from nervousness or vibrating with excitement, but I took my husband's hand and stood there trying not to cry.
I stole a glance out over the crowd and my heart burst open with love at all the smiling faces of those who loved us, who came to show their support for us, to be a part of something so special in our lives.
His family came in while we were having our first dance, but mama wanted to hear our vows when we got back to our house, so we did them for her.
It was the best day of my life!!!!  I married the man of my dreams again!!